Your relationship may be abusive if…
- You are afraid to express your true feelings or tell your partner about your own needs and ambitions.
- You are kept away from, or are discouraged from seeing, family and friends.
- You are accused of cheating, even when you have done nothing wrong.
- You have to account for your whereabouts at all times.
- You are almost always tense and worried about how your partner will react.
- You feel responsible for making your partner happy and always take the blame when things go wrong.
- You are often making excuses or lying to family, friends and co-workers to hide the situation at home.
- You are constantly being criticized by your partner and feel you can never do anything right.
- You are told you are “crazy” or “too sensitive” when you try to talk about your concerns.
- You feel trapped and are unhappy in your relationship most of the time.
Abusers often use threats to keep their wives and girlfriends in a constant state of anxiety and fear and to maintain power and control over them.
If your partner is abusive he may threaten to hurt you, the children or your pets. He may also threaten to leave you, to take the children away, or to report you to the authorities if you don’t do what he says. Some abusers will threaten to commit suicide if their partners leave them.